The Difference between C and C++ ....
wow style ;)
Thursday, November 24, 2011
The yuq max cake ?? is it ?
For those who remember The special scene from Me myself and Irene
This cake as food for your thoughts
Friday, October 14, 2011
~ Window A Virus ? ~
Windows ?? Virus ??
No, Windows is not a virus. Here's what viruses do:
1.They replicate quickly - okay, Windows does that.
2.Viruses use up valuable system resources, slowing down the system as they do so - okay, Windows does that.
3.Viruses will, from time to time, trash your hard disk - okay, Windows does that too.
4.Viruses are usually carried, unknown to the user, along with valuable programs and systems. - Sigh.. Windows does that, too.
5.Viruses will occasionally make the user suspect their system is too slow (see 2) and the user will buy new hardware. - Yup, Windows does that, too.
Until now it seems Windows is a virus but there are fundamental differences: Viruses are well supported by their authors, are running on most systems, their program code is fast, compact and efficient and they tend to become more sophisticated as they mature.
So Windows is not a virus.
It's a bug.
No, Windows is not a virus. Here's what viruses do:
1.They replicate quickly - okay, Windows does that.
2.Viruses use up valuable system resources, slowing down the system as they do so - okay, Windows does that.
3.Viruses will, from time to time, trash your hard disk - okay, Windows does that too.
4.Viruses are usually carried, unknown to the user, along with valuable programs and systems. - Sigh.. Windows does that, too.
5.Viruses will occasionally make the user suspect their system is too slow (see 2) and the user will buy new hardware. - Yup, Windows does that, too.
Until now it seems Windows is a virus but there are fundamental differences: Viruses are well supported by their authors, are running on most systems, their program code is fast, compact and efficient and they tend to become more sophisticated as they mature.
So Windows is not a virus.
It's a bug.
--ACCESS DENIED--
ACCESS DENIED
This guy calls in to complain that he gets an "Access Denied" message every time he logs in. It turned out he was typing his user name and password in capital letters.
Tech Support: "OK, let's try once more, but use lower case letters."
Customer: "Uh, I only have capital letters on my keyboard."
This guy calls in to complain that he gets an "Access Denied" message every time he logs in. It turned out he was typing his user name and password in capital letters.
Tech Support: "OK, let's try once more, but use lower case letters."
Customer: "Uh, I only have capital letters on my keyboard."
Thursday, October 13, 2011
The Offline Dog
The Offline Dog
Three kids were walking down a road in the countryside.
You could clearly make out how much they were influenced by chat/SMS lingo when they passed a stray dog and one of them asked it, "Wassup?"
As the other two smiled, he answered for the dog, "NM*," and they continued walking.
When they reached the next dog, he again said, "Wassup," and also supplied the answering, "NM."
By the time he did this with the fourth dog, his friends were openly sniggering.
But when he passed over the fifth dog to go "Wassup?" at the sixth, they pulled his elbow and asked him why he'd left the previous one out.
"Oh," he shrugged, "that one is offline."
Three kids were walking down a road in the countryside.
You could clearly make out how much they were influenced by chat/SMS lingo when they passed a stray dog and one of them asked it, "Wassup?"
As the other two smiled, he answered for the dog, "NM*," and they continued walking.
When they reached the next dog, he again said, "Wassup," and also supplied the answering, "NM."
By the time he did this with the fourth dog, his friends were openly sniggering.
But when he passed over the fifth dog to go "Wassup?" at the sixth, they pulled his elbow and asked him why he'd left the previous one out.
"Oh," he shrugged, "that one is offline."
Newton Laws For Engineers
Newton first Law
Every Engineer continues his state of chatting or forwarding mails
unless he is assigned work by external unbalanced manager.
Newton second Law
The rate of change in the Work is directly proportional to the payment
received from client and takes place at the quick rate when deadline
force is applied.
Newton Third Law
For every appraisal there is an equal but opposite Work Implementation.
Bonus Law -4
Mistakes can neither be created nor be removed from drawings by an
engineer. It can only be converted from one form to another. The total
number of mistakes in the drawing always remains constant.
Every Engineer continues his state of chatting or forwarding mails
unless he is assigned work by external unbalanced manager.
Newton second Law
The rate of change in the Work is directly proportional to the payment
received from client and takes place at the quick rate when deadline
force is applied.
Newton Third Law
For every appraisal there is an equal but opposite Work Implementation.
Bonus Law -4
Mistakes can neither be created nor be removed from drawings by an
engineer. It can only be converted from one form to another. The total
number of mistakes in the drawing always remains constant.
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
Password Error
Tech support: Are you sure you used the right
password?
Customer: Yes, I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it.
Tech support: Can you tell me what the password was?
Customer: Five stars.
Customer: Yes, I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it.
Tech support: Can you tell me what the password was?
Customer: Five stars.
The 3 Engineers
The 3 Engineers
There are three engineers in a car: an electrical engineer, a chemical engineer and a Microsoft engineer.
Suddenly the car just stops by the side of the road, and the three engineers look at each other wondering what could be wrong.
The electrical engineer suggests stripping down the electronics of the car and trying to trace where a fault might have occurred.
The chemical engineer, not knowing much about cars, suggests that maybe the fuel is becoming emulsified and getting blocked somewhere.
Then, the Microsoft engineer, not knowing much about anything, comes up with a suggestion, "Why don't we close all the windows, get out, get back in, open the windows again, and maybe it'll work!?"
Monday, October 10, 2011
The Microsoft Waiter
The Microsoft Waiter
Patron: Waiter!
Waiter: Hi, my name is Bill, and I'll be your Support Waiter. What seems to be the problem?
Patron: There's a fly in my soup!
Waiter: Try again, maybe the fly won't be there this time.
Patron: No, it's still there.
Waiter: Maybe it's the way you're using the soup; try eating it with a fork instead.
Patron: Even when I use the fork, the fly is still there.
Waiter: Maybe the soup is incompatible with the bowl; what kind of bowl are you using?
Patron: A SOUP bowl!
Waiter: Hmmm, that should work. Maybe it's a configuration problem; how was the bowl set up?
Patron: You brought it to me on a saucer; what has that to do with the fly in my soup?!
Waiter: Can you remember everything you did before you noticed the fly in your soup?
Patron: I sat down and ordered the Soup of the Day!
Waiter: Have you considered upgrading to the latest Soup of the Day?
Patron: You have more than one Soup of the Day each day?
Waiter: Yes, the Soup of the Day is changed every hour.
Patron: Well, what is the Soup of the Day now?
Waiter: The current Soup of the Day is tomato.
Patron: Fine. Bring me the tomato soup, and the check. I'm running late now.
[Waiter leaves and returns with another bowl of soup and the check]
Waiter: Here you are, Sir. The soup and your check.
Patron: This is potato soup.
Waiter: Yes, the tomato soup wasn't ready yet.
Patron: Well, I'm so hungry now, I'll eat anything.
[The waiter leaves.]
Patron: Waiter! There's a gnat in my soup!
The check:
Soup of the Day . . . . . . . . . . $5.00
Upgrade to newer Soup of the Day. . $2.50
Access to support . . . . . . . . . $1.00
Patron: Waiter!
Waiter: Hi, my name is Bill, and I'll be your Support Waiter. What seems to be the problem?
Patron: There's a fly in my soup!
Waiter: Try again, maybe the fly won't be there this time.
Patron: No, it's still there.
Waiter: Maybe it's the way you're using the soup; try eating it with a fork instead.
Patron: Even when I use the fork, the fly is still there.
Waiter: Maybe the soup is incompatible with the bowl; what kind of bowl are you using?
Patron: A SOUP bowl!
Waiter: Hmmm, that should work. Maybe it's a configuration problem; how was the bowl set up?
Patron: You brought it to me on a saucer; what has that to do with the fly in my soup?!
Waiter: Can you remember everything you did before you noticed the fly in your soup?
Patron: I sat down and ordered the Soup of the Day!
Waiter: Have you considered upgrading to the latest Soup of the Day?
Patron: You have more than one Soup of the Day each day?
Waiter: Yes, the Soup of the Day is changed every hour.
Patron: Well, what is the Soup of the Day now?
Waiter: The current Soup of the Day is tomato.
Patron: Fine. Bring me the tomato soup, and the check. I'm running late now.
[Waiter leaves and returns with another bowl of soup and the check]
Waiter: Here you are, Sir. The soup and your check.
Patron: This is potato soup.
Waiter: Yes, the tomato soup wasn't ready yet.
Patron: Well, I'm so hungry now, I'll eat anything.
[The waiter leaves.]
Patron: Waiter! There's a gnat in my soup!
The check:
Soup of the Day . . . . . . . . . . $5.00
Upgrade to newer Soup of the Day. . $2.50
Access to support . . . . . . . . . $1.00
You Are Addicted To The Internet ?!
You Are Addicted To The Internet If:-
A VRML virtual walk through a park is your idea of a good date.
You kiss your girlfriend's home page.
Your bookmark takes 15 minutes to scroll from top to bottom.
Your bookmark takes 15 minutes to scroll from top to bottom.
Your eyeglasses have a web site burned in on them.
All your daydreaming is preoccupied with getting a faster connection to the net: 28.8...ISDN...cable modem...T1...T3.
And even your night dreams are in HTML.
You turn off your modem and get this awful empty feeling, like you just pulled the plug on a loved one.
You refer to going to the bathroom as downloading.
You start introducing yourself as "Jim at I-I-Net dot net dot au
Your heart races faster and beats irregularly each time you see a new WWW site address in print or on TV, even though you've never had heart problems before.
You step out of your room and realize that your parents have moved and you don't have a clue when it happened.
You turn on your intercom when leaving the room so you can hear if new e-mail arrives.
Your wife drapes a blond wig over your monitor to remind you of what she looks like.
All of your friends have an @ in their names.
When looking at a pageful of someone else's links, you notice all of them are already highlighted in purple.
Your dog has its own home page.
Your dog's homepage is actually good.
You can't call your mother...she doesn't have a modem.
You check your mail. It says "no new messages." So you check it again.
Your phone bill comes to your doorstep in a box.
You code your homework in HTML and give your instructor the URL.
You don't know the sex of three of your closest friends, because they have neutral nicknames and you never bothered to ask.
Your husband tells you he's had the beard for 2 months.
You wake up at 3 a.m. to go to the bathroom and stop and check your e-mail on the way back to bed.
You tell the kids they can't use the computer because "Daddy's got work to do" and you don't even have a job.
You buy a Captain Kirk chair with a built-in keyboard and mouse.
Your wife makes a new rule: "The computer cannot come to bed."
You get a tattoo that says "This body best viewed with Netscape 2.01 or higher."
You never have to deal with busy signals when calling your ISP...because you never log off.
The last girl you picked up was only a jpeg.
You ask a plumber how much it would cost to replace the chair in front of your computer with a toilet.
Your wife says communication is important in a marriage...so you buy another computer and install a second phone line so the two of you can chat.
As your car crashes through the guardrail on a mountain road, your first instinct is to search for the "back" button.
Saturday, October 8, 2011
Facebook Wall
Dad's writes on son's Facebook wall:
"Dear Son, How are you? All are fine here. We miss you a lot.
Please!! TURN OFF THE COMPUTER & COME
DOWN FOR DINNER!!! "
An IT Husband :the old one ?
An IT Husband
---------------------
Starting the day with a conversation between a
wife and a husband who happens to be a software
engineer.
Husband :(Returning late from work) "Good Evening Dear, I'm now logged in."
Husband :(Returning late from work) "Good Evening Dear, I'm now logged in."
Wife :Have you brought the grocery?
Husband :Bad command or file name.
Wife :But I told you in the morning
Husband :Erroneous syntax. Abort?
Wife :What about my new TV?
Husband :Variable not found ...
Wife :At least, give me your Credit Card, I want to do some shopping.
Husband :Sharing Violation. Access denied...
Wife :Do you love me or do you only love computers or are you just being funny?
Husband :Too many parameters ...
Wife :It was a great mistake that I married an idiot like you.
Husband :Data type mismatch.
Wife :You are useless.
Husband :It's by Default.
Wife :What about your Salary?
Husband :File in use ... Try after some time.
Wife :What is my value in the family.
Husband :Unknown Virus.
Thursday, September 15, 2011
Tuesday, September 13, 2011
Tuesday, September 6, 2011
The best songs for some people who like to enjoy life ... and...
The best songs for some people who
..love to live Their life ...
..to enjoy Their Life at the fullest ...
... who are curious to know things ...
... who are curious to experiment with things and even people ...
... who are learning to grow no matter who or what the cost is ...
.. the life of TODAY ..
........... enjoy the songs ........
Monday, August 8, 2011
BENEFITS OF DRINKING... finally compiled ....
A Common message to everyone who says drinking is bad. Here are the advantages of each brand that people drink.
| DCSL EXTRA SPECIAL | Protects your heart | prevents constipation | Blocks diarrhea | Improves lung capacity | Cushions joints |
| WHITE DIAMOND | Combats cancer | Controls blood pressure | Saves your eyesight | Shields against Alzheimer's | Slows aging process |
| BLUE LABEL | Aids digestion | Lowers cholesterol | Protects your heart | Stabilizes blood sugar | Guards against liver disease |
| DOUBLE DISTILLED | Battles diabetes | Lowers cholesterol | Helps stops strokes | Controls blood pressure | Smoothes skin |
| OLD RESERVE | Protects your heart | Quiets a cough | Strengthens bones | Controls blood pressure | Blocks diarrhea |
| RITZ | Prevents constipation | Helps hemorrhoids | Lowers cholesterol | Combats cancer | Stabilizes blood sugar |
| RICHORT | Controls blood pressure | Combats cancer | Strengthens bones | Protects your heart | Aids weight loss |
| HANNEPIER | Combats cancer | Protects your heart | Stabilizes blood sugar | Boosts memory | Prevents constipation |
| FRANKLIN | Strengthens bones | Saves eyesight | Combats cancer | Protects your heart | Controls blood pressure |
| VSO | Combats cancer | Prevents constipation | Promotes weight loss | Protects your heart | Helps hemorrhoids |
| GALLERY | Saves eyesight | Controls blood pressure | Lowers cholesterol | Combats cancer | Supports immune system |
| RED RUM | Saves eyesight | Protects your heart | Prevents constipation | Combats cancer | Promotes weight loss |
| DARK RUM | Protects against Prostate Cancer | Combats Breast Cancer | Strengthens bones | Banishes bruises | Guards against heart disease |
| HANSEN | Protects your heart | Combats Cancer | Ends insomnia | Slows aging process | Shields against Alzheimer's |
| BLACK WHITE | Promotes weight loss | Protects your heart | Lowers cholesterol | Combats Cancer | Controls blood pressure |
| RED LABEL | Aids digestion | Soothes sore throat | Clears sinuses | Combats Cancer | Boosts immune system |
| BLACK LABEL | Promotes weight loss | Helps stops strokes | Lowers cholesterol | Combats Cancer | Controls blood pressure |
| GOLD LABEL | Protects your heart | Boosts memory | Protects your heart | Combats Cancer | Supports immune system |
| CHIVAS REGAL | Aids digestion | Battles diabetes | Protects your heart | Improves mental health | Boosts immune system |
| GRANTS | Lowers cholesterol | Controls blood pressure | Combats cancer | kills bacteria | Fights fungus |
| GREEN LABEL | Protects against heart attacks | Promotes Weight loss | Helps stops strokes | Combats Prostate Cancer | Lowers cholesterol |
| REMUS MARTIN | saves eyesight | Conquers kidney stones | Combats cancer | Enhances blood flow | Protects your heart |
| V&A | Combats cancer | Protects your heart | Helps stops strokes | Promotes Weight loss | Kills bacteria |
| NAPOLEON | Heals wounds | Aids digestion | Guards against ulcers | Increases energy | Fights allergies |
| MENDIS | Combats cancer | Protects your heart | Controls blood pressure | Smoothes skin | Stops scurvy |
| LEMON GIN | Combats cancer | Protects your heart | Controls blood pressure | Smoothes skin | Stops scurvy |
| ORANGE GIN | Combats cancer | Boosts memory | Regulates thyroid | aids digestion | Shields against Alzheimer's |
| WHITE GIN | Controls blood pressure | Lowers cholesterol | Kills bacteria | Combats cancer | Strengthens bones |
| DRY GIN | Lowers cholesterol | Combats cancer | Battles diabetes | prevents constipation | Smoothes skin |
| CLASIC RUM | Protects your heart | Promotes Weight loss | Combats cancer | Battles diabetes | Smoothes skin |
| VODKA | Reduce risk of heart attack | Combats cancer | Kills bacteria | Lowers cholesterol | Fights fungus |
| SMIRNOFF | Supports immune systems | Combats cancer | Protects your heart | Straightens respiration | |
| GALETINE | prevents constipation | Combats cancer | Helps stops strokes | aids digestion | Helps hemorrhoids |
| GOLD COIN | Protects against heart disease | Promotes Weight loss | Combats Prostate Cancer | Lowers cholesterol | Aggravates diverticulitis |
| BACARDI | Strengthens bones | Relieves colds | Aids digestion | Dissolves warts | Blocks diarrhea |
| WHITE RUM | Slows aging process | prevents constipation | boosts memory | Lowers cholesterol | Protects against heart disease |
| ILICITY ARACK | Protects your heart | Battles diabetes | Conquers kidney stones | Combats cancer | Helps stops strokes |
| POT ARRACK | Combats cancer | Protects your heart | | | |
Remember - Your Friends health is as important as yours - do not forget to call them while taking this….!
Thursday, August 4, 2011
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