Sunday, May 8, 2011

Comparison of marriages - Love VS Arranged

Comparison of marriages - IT style

Love Marriage	Arranged Marriage
Resembles procedural programming language. We have some set functions like flirting, going to movies together, making long conversations on phone and then try to fit all functions to the candidate we like.	Similar to object oriented programmingapproach. We first fix the candidate and then try to implement functions on her. The functions are added to supplement the main program. The functions can be added or deleted.
It is a throwaway type of prototype as client requirements rises with time thus it is a dynamic system and difficult to maintain.	Requirements are well defined so use of waterfall model is possible

Family system hangs because hardware (called parents) is not responding.	Compatible with hardware (Parents).
You are the project leader so u are responsible for implementation and execution of PROJECT- married life.	You are a team member under project leader (parents) so they are responsible for successful execution of project Married life.
Client expectations include exciting feature as spouse cooking ! food, washing clothes etc.	All these features are covered in the SRS as required features.
Acceptance test possible you can try before you Buy.	Product is sold on an as is where is basis. Product once sold will not be taken back!
Love Marriage is like Windows , beautiful n seductive.... Yet one never knows when it will crash....	Arranged Marriage is like Unix... boring n colorless... still extremely reliable n robust.

Dat's Imprudent - Effect of NOT Wearing a watch

Effect of NOT Wearing a watch

Young Man Sir, may I know the time, please

Old Man Certainly not.

Young Man Sir, but why What are you going to lose,if

You tell me the time

Old Man Yes, I may lose something if I tell you the time.

Young Man But Sir, can you tell me how

Old Man See, if I tell you the time you will definitely thank me and may be tomorrow again you will ask me the time.

Young Man Quite possible.

Old Man May be we meet two three times more and you will ask my name and address.

Young Man Quite possible.

Old Man One day you may come to my house saying you were just passing by and came into wish me. Then as a courtesy, I will offer you a cup of tea. After my courteous approach you will try to come again.This time you will appreciate tea and ask who has made it.

Young Man Possible

Old Man Then I will tell you that my daughter has and I will then have to introduce my young and pretty daughter to you & you will admire my daughter.

Young Man Smiles.

Old Man Now onwards you will try to meet my daughter again and again. You will offer her to go out for a movie together and a date with you.

Young Man Smiles

Old Man My daughter may start liking you and start waiting for you. After meeting regularly you will fall in love with her and propose her for marriage.

Young Man Smiles

Old Man One day both of you will come to me and tell me about your love and ask for my permission.

Young Man Oh Yes! And smiles

Old Man (Angrily) Young man, I will never marry my daughter to a person like you who does not even own a watch.

Inspirational Poem : Mom and Dad : In Hindi

Jab Tu Paida Huwa Kitna Majboor Tha
Yeh Jahan Teri Sonch Se Bhi Dour Tha...

Haath Paaon Bhi Tab Tere Apney Na Thay
Teri Ankhon Main Duniya Ke Sapney Na Thay...

Tujh Ko Aata Sirf Rona Hi Tha
Doodh Pi Ke Kaam Tera Sona Hi Tha...

Tujh Ko Chalna Sikhaya Tha Maa Ne Teri
Tujh Ko Dil Main Basaya Tha Maa Ne Teri...

Maa Ke Saaye Main Parwaan Chadne Laga
Waqt Ke Sath Qad Tera Badne Laga...

Dhirey Dhirey Tu Kadiyal Jawan Ho Gaya
Tujh Pe Saara Jahan Meharban Ho Gaya...

Zor-e- Bazoo Pe Tu Baat Karne Laga
Khud Hi Sajney Laga Khud Sanwarney Laga...

Ek Din Ek Ladki Tujhe Bhaa Gayei
Ban Ke Dulhan Woh Tere Ghar Agayei...

Ab Faraayez Se Tu Door Honay Laga
Beej Nafrat Ka Khud Hi Tu Boney Laga...

Phir Tu Maa Baap Ko Bhi Bhulaaney Laga
Teer Baton Ke Phir Tu Chalaney Laga...

Baat Be Baat Unn Se Tu Ladney Laga
Qayda ek Naya Tu Phir PaDnay Laga...

Yaad Kar Tujh Se Maa Ne Kaha ek Din
Abb Humara Guzara Nahin Tere Bin...

Sunn Ke Yeh Baat Tu Tayesh Main Agaya
Tera Gussa Teri Aqal Ko Kha Gaya...

Josh Main Aake Tu Ne Yeh Maa Se Kaha
Main Tha Khamosh Sab Dekhta Hi Raha...

Aaj Kehta Hoon Peecha Mera Chor Do
Jo Hai Rishta Mera Tum Se Woh Tod Do...

Jao Ja Ke Kahin Kaam Dhanda Karo
Log Marte Hain Tum Bhi Kahin Ja Maro...

Bait Kar Aahen Bharti Thi Maa Raat Bhar
Inki Aahon Ka Tujh Par Howa Na Asar...

Ek Din Baap tera Chala Rooth Kar
Kaise Bikhri Thi Phir Teri Maa Toot Kar...

Phir Woh Bhi Bas kal Ko Bhulati Rahi
Zindagi Isko Har Roz Satati Rahi...

Ek Din Maut Ko Bhi Taras Agaya
Iska Rona Bhi Taqdeer Ko Bha Gaya...

Ashk Ankhon Main Thay Woh Rawana Huwi
Maut Ki Ek Hichki Bahana Huwi...

Ek Sukoon Us ke Chehre Pe Chaaney Laga
Phir Tu Mayyat Ko Uski Sajaney Laga...

Muddatain Ho Gayi Aaj Booddha Hai Tu
Tooti Khatiya Pe PaDa Bora Hai Tu...

Tere Bacche Bhi Abb Tujh Se Dartey Nahi
Nafraten Hain, Muhabbat Woh Kartey Nahi...

Dard Mein Tu Pukare Ke "O MERI MAA"
TERE DAM SE HI ROSHAN THE DONO JAHAN...

Waqt Chalta Rahta Hai Waqt Rukta Nahi
Toot Jata Hai Woh Jo Ke Jhukta Nahi...

Bann Ke Ibrat Ka Tu Abb Nishaan Reh Gaya
Dhoondh ab Zor Tera Kahan Reh Gaya...

Tu AHKAAM-E-RABBI Bhulata Raha
APNE MAAN-BAAP KO TU SATATA RAHA...

Kaat Le Tu Wohi, Tu Ne Boya Tha Jo
Tujh Ko Kaise Miley Tu Ne Khoya Tha Jo...

Yaad Kar Ke Gaya Daur, Tu Rone Laga
Kal Jo Tu Ne Kiya Aaj Phir Hone Laga...

Maut Maange Tujhe Maut Aati Nahin
Maa Ki Surat Nigahon Se Jati Nahi...

Tu Jo Khanse Tu Aulad Daantey Tujhe
Tu Hai Nasoor Sukh Kaun Baantey Tujhe...

Maut Ayegi Tujh Ko Magar Waqt Par
Bann Hi Jaye Gi Qabar Teri Waqt Par...

QADAR MAA BAAP KI GAR KOI JAAN LE
APNI JANNAT KO DUNIYA MAIN PEHCHAN LE...

Aur Leyta Rahe Woh BaDaun Ki Dua
Usi Ke Dono Jahan, Uska Haami KHUDA...

Yaad Rakhna her aulaad Is Baat Ko
Bhool Jana Na REHMAT KI BARSAT Ko.......... .....

Einstein on a travel....

I know who I am but what i don't know is where I'm going

Albert Einstein, was once traveling from Princeton on a train when the conductor came down the aisle, punching the tickets of every passenger. When he came to Einstein, the famous physicist reached in his vest pocket. He couldn't find his ticket, so he reached in his trouser pockets. It wasn't there, so he looked in his briefcase but couldn't find it. Then he looked in the seat beside him. He still couldn't find it.

The conductor said, "Dr. Einstein, I know who you are. We all know who you are. I'm sure you bought a ticket. Don't worry about it."

Einstein nodded appreciatively. The conductor then continued down the aisle punching tickets. As he was ready to move to the next car, he turned around and saw the great physicist down on his hands and knees looking under his seat for his ticket.

The conductor rushed back and said, "Dr. Einstein, don't worry, I know who you are. No problem. You don't need a ticket. I'm sure you bought one."

Einstein looked at him and said, "Young man, I too know who I am. What I don't know is where I'm going."

Kids Are Quick

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TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America ..

MARIA: Here it is.

TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America ?

CLASS: Maria.

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TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?

JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.

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TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell 'crocodile?'

GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L'

TEACHER: No, that's wrong

GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.

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TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?

DONALD: H I J K L M N O.

TEACHER: What are you talking about?

DONALD: Yesterday you said it's H to O.

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TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.

WINNIE: Me!

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TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty?

GLEN: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.

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TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with " I "

MILLIE: I is..

TEACHER: No, Millie..... Always say, 'I am.'

MILLIE: All right ... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."

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TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it.

Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him?

LOUIS: Because George still had the axe in his hand....

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TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?

SIMON: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.

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TEACHER: Clyde , your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's ... Did you copy his?

CLYDE : No, sir. It's the same dog.

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TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?

HAROLD: A teacher

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Late but not to late to brighten your life in the new year !!

Let’s follow the ZOOZOO way to brighten our lives in the new year !!

Party hard

Stay in touch wit friends

Never be a loner

Be a team player

Have fun @ work

Find time for ur loved ones

Surprise ur dear ones

Play like a kid

Quarrel at times

But patch up soon

And finally, sport a smile and stay happy always !!

Hear what the guru says

Hear what the guru says